“Woman Kills Three For Last X-Box at Chicago Wal-Mart”

[“Some American officials are calling a trip to the mall an act of patriotism as the United States tries to rebound and rebuild.” went a common news refrain after 9/11/2001.  Today, “patriotic” consumers are enlisted into the hyperbolic fray between Microsoft’s X-Box One and the latest Playstation, a war on which one reporter commented: “by taking part in the rivalry, you’re doing little more than fighting on behalf of a massive corporation without benefitting at all yourself.”  Black Friday sales at Walmart and Target were successfully dominated by Microsoft’s X-Box One.  A satirical (Daily Currant) account of a frenzied example of  “Round One”, at Walmart in Chicago, is given below, and many who have heard this story believe it, because it rings true.  Unfortunately, there are many similarly frenzied but factual accounts of intense consumer fights over meaningless junk acquisition.  —  Frontlines ed.]
November 30, 2013, The Daily Currant

Walmart_exteriorA woman was arrested today for stabbing to death three shoppers at a Chicago-area Wal-Mart in order to secure the store’s last X-Box One.

Mary Robbins, a married mother of two, reportedly wrestled her competitors to the ground before fatally wounding them with a sharpened Phillips head screwdriver. 

The victim’s names have not yet been released, but are said to include a sociology student at Northwestern University, a chemistry teacher at at local high school and a young pregnant woman buying a system for her brother. Continue reading